Thursday, June 14, 2012

Special Request

A friend of mine made a personal request for topic. He asked a couple of questions and I will try and tackle them in the best way possible. But I welcome others to also give your input on the matter as well.

1.       Do people’s “superficialness” get in the way of finding true love? I say that because I hear a lot of females want a guy that has a house, nice car, and dress a certain way or make a certain amount of money and the blue collar male doesn’t really look all that appealing to them.

Well I guess I’ll just go ahead and tell you my short answer. No, but I do understand how you can come up with the conclusion that it does.
 In my opinion what’s really going on is when certain females look at these things they get a concept of a “man”. It shows his commitment, dedication and drive to get the things that he wants and women will translate that to .. “Well, he would be dedicated to me and committed because I could be something he wants, right?” We have to understand the outward qualities is not always the best way to gain insight of someone’s internal qualities. Which is where you are coming from but hey it does work sometimes. So how can you argue with them? The real problem I see with thinking this way is it translates emptiness, the relationship won’t always turn out to be about what it was intended to become. It will just be about the things.
Let me say, I’m not materialistic but I appreciate material. I had a relationship where I didn’t care how much he made or what he had, the relationship was based on his personality and interests (this is wrong thinking by the way) but he wanted me to be more superficial (funny huh?) There are more details to that but my point is it’s not just one sided. Some men think that if they don’t see things happening for them they are not doing something right. Who knows which one came first the man concept from being so hard on themselves as a provider or women’s concept of what a provider should look like?
The TRUTH is even this won’t deter finding true love. You can find people who believe in superficial and they will love it and all the things the gain from this “love” and live Happily Ever After. Some people just have a different definition of love. For me.. God is love..He provides.. and it’s a hard but simple concept to grasp by many people. The only true thing that gets in the way of finding “true” love is not having a solid foundation and you will find yourself trying to rely on making one with another person if it’s not strong. Which brings me to your next question….

2.       And what happened to two people building something together?

It doesn’t exist. I know that’s harsh and you maybe like “Geeze,  Grace how cynical of you to say such a thing, Do you even believe in true love?” Yes, of course I do but I don’t believe in a “perfect” love presented by man. Tell me, what are you building that you would need help from a person you met and became familiar with? Your life? A home, family?  Well, you can do that by yourself. Even if a single woman wanted children there’s a bank where they can receive a generous donation towards the cause. I’m being too real now huh? I think what’s difficult for people is getting rid of concepts that the world presents in ads and promotions to sale goods and products without leaving them discouraged with life. This is when all things seem pointless, meaningless, in vain.
 Love just is. It doesn’t build because it would be what you build up to. So you and your significant other should have already been working on this as individuals even before getting to know each other.  So where does this love come about? Remember when I said God is love, he created it, built it, it’s Divine! We accept His love and when you choose the individual to marry you are honoring this LOVE, honoring Him. That’s why it’s is signified by a vow to God to commit to this love and your partner is your personal, first-hand witness of this vow. You both are there as a witness for each other,  to make sure you both keep this vow to HIM. Your partner was the best candidate for you to keep your “foundation” strong. So you are not building because it’s already built! You are keeping . 
So then the next question is what happened to understanding this? Well there are many pitfalls that man has created for themselves from getting this but remember in my lesson notes when I said we fight not against flesh and blood … well it goes back to that. I encourage everyone following this blog to keep studying His word. And seeking after His wisdom, even God’s foolishness is wiser than man’s wisdom. 

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